This is my story, my myth, my truth and the story goes that this is also your myth, your story, and your truth. This is the story of Indra and how he turned into me. This is the story of a beach and of the ocean. This is a story of shells that come home and the lovers that do not. The story of how twenty authors came to Hawaii without ever leaving home. This is the story of Pele and Kali and how they became one, within a girl from eastern Washington. This is interconnectedness, auto-bio-mytho-poises, individuation, reincarnation, alchemy, education and truth.I set out on this project to answer the question “What is art? Why do we make it? And how does that shape our consciousness and in turn shape our culture?” I started with my friends in casual conversation, dropping subtle questions in anywhere I could fit. Through these chats with friends I formulated a series of 6 questions ranging from thoughts on cultural identity to philosophical reasons for the creation of art. Through these formal, video recorded interviews I started to see an overwhelming pattern of thought; Art IS language. No matter how it was stated or reworded, the answers where all the same. Art is the way we communicate the abstract, the fleeting, the unspeakable. From the dancing women of Alice Walker’s Over Coming Speechlessness, to the deity worshiping art-surrounding Pele, to the intricate details of these seashells, art is the way we and all other creatures express what cannot be express.The first part seemed to be so universally clear, art is a language and we create to communicate. The second half, the bit surrounding consciousness, that was a bit harder to decipher. I listened to many different artists speak at the Alcheyemez Visionary Arts and Consciousness Conference, all of them discussing what the connections of art and consciousness really consists of. Speakers like, Jamie Janover claimed ancient, sacred geometry is the bridge between art and consciousness while the day before Romio Shrestha stated he was the seventeenth reincarnation of the master Tibetan Thangka painter Arniko and that was where his art came from. Artists like Chris Dyer feel that connection through skate culture turned visionary in contrast to head promoter of the festival Rio Gordon whose connection comes through his fellow artist. I danced for three days with the president of the Maui Dance Advocates, Anthony Simmons, who said that dancing just comes from within, a feeling that is pulled out with music. I read myths and stories about the authors of myths, like The Heart Eater a Sri Lankan story about a Genie that eats the hearts of the villagers to gain power. The author says that this story came from his grandmother just before he was kidnapped to become a child soldier, making ancestry and memory the root of his conscious connection to art. I spoke with the people that were kind enough to house me, like Maverick Carvalho who sang the Goddess into a the “Genius Waitress”, calling upon the love of and for women as his passion to create. I built a sculpture in the yard of a friend to explore why I create and where it comes from, finding that my creation comes from the deep within the earth and myself. From this information and the words of great authors such as, David Loy, who spoke to me like a Buddha of the 21^st century, telling me to connect myself to everything and become nothing, to the myths of the pantheon of Hawaiian Goddess and Gods, I realized they were all saying the same thing. They were all saying everything and nothing; the fact that they could all express any answer to my questions is the answer. We are all connected through words and when words fail we get creative, we move, we dance, we draw, we sing, we play, we all find a way to express the same idea; we are one.Not just in the way that we are all made up of protons and electrons that are popping in and out of existence, but that we are all part of the same kind of conscious reality. People tried to explain why we create or how we create and at the same time were creating, just as I am now, trying to pull together the reasons for doing something we can’t truly explain. The connection between consciousness and art I asked, well, there is no connection, it is connection. Art is the expression of consciousness, which is the expression of other people’s art. For example, language is the greatest form of art and it holds the greatest influence on our consciousness. To express that consciousness, we create art, which other people are then influenced by and decide to make more art to try to explain the connection. I have been shaped by the art that surrounds me and the culture that art is trying to express, therefore the need to express something intangible in an intangible way. Something needs to be created right at that moment through a form that each of us honed to use. Some of us tell stories, some paint and draw, some build houses, some knit tiny sweaters for their dogs. The conclusion that I have come to is that, no matter how you put it, humans create to communicate, we communicate to express that we are the same and we are conscious to be able to see the connection. The art we create is a way to express to each other the same idea, to express the collective consciousness in a way that denotes more than one form of language at a time. It takes multiply layers to express the unyielding thoughts of our own conscious mind but add it that of the collective conscious and humans need much more than words to try and communicate that kind of information.

Alchemeyez: 72 hours of dancing 3 hours of sleeping

Day One:
We arrive at 10am to what seems a Disney Land theme park on Buddhism. There are 3 towers of rooms connected by a stream for the wooden boats and a tiny train, 2 water slides, DOLPHINS in a pool much too small, lagoon equipped with sea turtles and tropical fish, 4,000 "normies", 1,500 pixies, fairies, hippies, framers, artists, musicians and Russell, Katie and I. Alchemeyez is a 3 day non-stop visionary arts and consciousness conference held at the Hilton Waikoloa. The conference went from 10am to 6am, yes that is 6am...which means no time for sleep! The first day stated off with Dr. Tim Freeman followed by amazing talk with artist Romio Shestha. Romio's talk reminded me of the book No Self, No Problem by Anam Thubten, he spoke of the connection to God one has while creating art. "You loose yourself and become a channel." he said while holding up a 6 foot high canvas. Romio's art was displayed as the focal point of the gallery, I guess when your canvas is over 15 feet you kind of steal the space. Romio told the audience that he has been painting for the last 17 reincarnations which would explain the immense detail and enormous scale of his art. After a full day of lectures and perusing the gallery and tons of artists booths we made our way to the dance floor. There were three rooms with DJs switching every hour or so until 6am. Dance Party!!!
Day Two:
With a little under 3 hours of sleep the day is already under way. Music blaring by 10am with lectures starting at noon. Artist Chris Dyer drew the crowd to roaring laughter with his visionary skateboards and Peruvian charm. He spoke on the power of positive creation. His main example was that in the skate community you see a lot of skulls, destruction and more negative imagery. His goal is to bring positive visionary art to the skate world with the intention of spreading positivity rather than destruction. After the day time lectures we attended the Lu'au fest complete with native Hawaiian dishes, fire dancers and music. The all you can eat buffet might have saved to weekend, it fed our whole crew for the next two days, thanks hotel mini-fridge! Directly after dinner was one of my favorite lectures of the weekend, Dennis McKenna on Plant-Human Co-Evolution and the origins of Imagination. Wow, don't really even know how to explain that one, spend hours on youtube looking trough his lectures, you will not be let down. The day of lectures finally came to a close around 10pm just in time for the best dancing of the weekend! 6am, man on the mic: "Thanks for dancing, it is 6am and the Hilton breakfast starts in 15 minutes if you could all go hide yourselves as soon as possible that would be great, oh, the music starts back up in 4 hours"... Picture for a moment the kinds of people that dance until 6am at a visionary arts and consciousness conference and then picture the kinds of people that vacation at the Hilton and eat breakfast at 6am... That is an interesting elevator ride!
Day Three: So we have logged a total of maybe 5 hours of sleep and over 40 hours of dancing and lectures... One more day! Sundays lectures were from all the artists giving them each the space to explain what art is to them and why they are apart of this conference. Of all the lectures Sunday Jamie Janover was by far the most intriguing. He spoke for about 2 hours about sacred geometry , noting the fact that the Big Island of Hawaii sits at 19.42 degrees which is in line with Tenochtitlan in Mexico, the Great Pyramid of Giza and the sunken pyramids of the coast of Japan all creating the middle line of a tetrahedron the size of the earth. Ancient space aliens and crop circles YO!!!! Check them out!!! After blowing my mind on aliens and crop circles it was time for more dancing... and more dancing.... and more dancing with friend and president of the Maui Dance Advocates Anthony Simmons (ps, it is illegal to dance in Maui, check out the site), capping the night off with an amazing performance by Heyoka at 5am! Danced the souls of my feet right off!
Over all this was an amazing festival and collective consciousness!!!

Volcanoes National Park

"High amounts of dangerous sulfur dioxide are present in the park." Not to mention high levels of wisdom, creation, destruction and visible signs of the Goddess Pele. I have never been to a place with such a dynamic landscape and history. "The volcanoes here are a part of the 3,600-mile-long Emperor Seamount and Hawaiian Island chain, also known as the Hawaiian archipelago. Kilauea and Mauna Loa are the the youngest and most active of the volcanoes. With an estimated volume of 16,500 to 19,00 cubic miles from its depressed sea-floor base, Mauna Loa is the most massive volcano on earth."-Volcanoes National Parks Visitor's Guide- I spent the last few days camping a few miles from the Halema'uma'u Crater at the center of the Kilauea Caldera. At night, its glow is so bright it can be seen from 1000s of yards away and its plume of toxic sulfur dioxide engulfs most of the 330,000-acre park. The landscape is something out of a sci-fi movie, miles upon miles of black earth scattered with the fearless life that springs up from its destruction. The 'Ōhi'a Lehua (the name 'Ōhi'a refers to the tree and Lehua to the flower) tree dots the seemingly deserted lava flow, scattering the land with beautiful red flowers. The 'Ōhi'a Lehua tree has a beautiful myth that goes something like this:

According to Hawaiian mythology, Pele, Goddess of the volcanoes, fell in love with a mortal, a man named ‘Ohi'a. ‘Ohi'a, however, was already deeply in love with a beautiful woman named Lehua, and was not swayed by Pele's charms. It seemed nothing could separate such a strong bond. When Pele realized how much ‘Ohi'a cared for Lehua, she fell into a rage of jealously for she knew she would never win the heart of the faithful ‘Ohi'a. In her wrath, Pele transformed ‘Ohi'a into an ugly, twisted tree and left Lehua terrified and weeping beside her lover. Lehua could not bear to be separated from him and begged Pele to return ‘Ohi'a to a man or else turn her into a tree, as well. The other Gods saw what Pele had done and took pity on Lehua. They transformed her into a beautiful red flower and placed her on the ‘Ohi'a tree. From then on, the Lehua flower always blooms on the ‘Ohi'a tree. It is said that if a lehua flower is plucked from the tree it grows on, rain falls. The rain is the tears Lehua cries, as she cannot bear to be separated from her true love.

Katie and I spent the day driving and hiking to some of the beautiful natural features I have ever been witness to. The Thurston Lava Tube ( a little interconnectedness of my home Thurston County!) is about 1/3 mile enormous cave that once housed the destruction of Pele herself and one of the more impressing sights in the park. My favorite of the sights was 1.4 mile hike through the petro-glyphs of Pu'uloa. Here is a little history... The name Pu'uloa (large hill) carries a Kaona (hidden meaning)- Hill of long life. Families with genealogical ties to these lands came here to place the Piko (umbilical cord) of their child. The hope is that the Mana (spiritual guiding energy) of Pu'uloa would bless that child with a long and prosperous life, and root them to their ancestral lands. Each Puka (hole) is created to house a single child's Piko. Of the 23,000 petro-glyphs, 16,000 are Piko related carvings- a testament to the importance of both Pu'uloa and 'ohana (family). The energy of in this part of the park was unsurpassed! The myth/truth in this land is so strong, it is undeniable, there is a presences here, be it Pele, be it God, or whatever you want to call it, it is here and strong enough to send chills up your spine and raise every hair on your body. I feel that I have seen the face of Pele and know her all powerful furry that has raised islands from the sea and brought to life the most wondrous place I have ever been lucky enough to witness with my own eyes. The myth of Hawai'i has become more than truth it has become a part of my truth, a part of the Goddess that lives within each of us and will forever shape me as a woman and a Goddess.

Beauty and the Sovereignty Of The Goddess

"What is the not beautiful? Our own secret hunger to be loved is the not-beautiful. Our disuse and misuse of love is the not beautiful. Our dereliction in loyalty and devotion unlovely, our sense of SOUL-SEPARATENESS is homely, our psychological warts, inadequacies, misunderstandings, and infantile fantasies are the not beautiful. Additionally, the Life/Death/Life nature, which births, destroys, incubates and births again, is considered by our cultures the not-beautiful."
-Clarissa Pinkola Estes- "Loving the Not-Beautiful"

I have been rereading the myths we all know; The Princess and the Frog, Zeus and Hera, King Arthur and the Green Knight. In the Arthurian myth of the Green Knight, Arthur is set forth to find the answer to the, in my opinion, greatest question of all, What do women want?. The answer, Sovereignty, being independent and unlimited by any other. How can we, as women, be sovereign and at the same time be part of everything? I feel that this idea of sovereignty has been twisted in the western world. The word 'independent' has taken on the quality of "without a man" and the line "unlimited by any other" has hardened a western woman's idea of self. The inability to find sovereignty within our own selves has forces us to search outside for the culprit of our lack of "independence". This kind of outward blame toward men, first off, and other women second, has given us a false sense of what independence actually is or that there is an independence to be found anywhere. I feel that this is the kind of thinking has lead us away from our Goddess and forced us to look everywhere but inside each of us for a source of power. So, look inside, find your Goddess and rewrite the myths of our past. Each one of us has the power to find "Sovereignty" and interconnectedness within, in a way that lets us be independently a part. My brain hurts now... I must think on this a bit more. I would love any feedback from my fellow Goddesses.... Aloha!

Building Of Indra's Net: Hawaiian Style

I am on a roll with my version of Indra's Net. I have been searching the property and have found just about everything I could need, and lots of stuff I just think is wicked cool. First wicked cool object: full motorcycle frame, fender to fender! Second wicked cool object, window frame perfect for weaving a net through. I have come to the idea that this net will be my story. The story of my days here, how I spend them and how I build from them. I am taking it slow, building just what I feel that day. My plan is by the end of these beautiful 5 weeks I will have built a myth of my own, my own net of knowledge and interconnectedness. I'm off to trek the....on the way up, HILL OF DEATH... on the way down, lovely mountain road... to search for more wicked cool backyard objects! It is getting cloudy, so that means the internet will be out in a bit so check back tomorrow for up dates including an interview with Mavrick Carvalho, Musician and Song Writer, and "K", a UN Tribal Advocate. Aloha!

Here and There

Wow! This island just keeps getting better and better. I have been solo for the last 6 days, no internet, no Katie, just me and the jungle! From the tiny Hawaiian hut to the main road is about a mile and a half, then the hitch-hiking begins! I have been thrown out of my comfort zone, the one where I own a car, know where I am, and can read and of the street signs, into a world of cars passing by, road side Kona coffee and riding with the locals. I have been picked up by a couple in a Benz, a self proclaimed "Dude" in a jeep with no doors, John the helicopter pilot, Jeff the school teacher, and Paddle Boy the fisherman! Talk about a way to meet the island family! With each ride comes the question, "What brings you to the Island?",
"Well.... I am on a quest to find the Western Goddess and her connections to art, consciousness and culture...."
This is usually followed by a pause and a look of, well, confusion. Not confusion of what I said, just of how I came to be here, in Hawai'i, searching for something that is all around.
The Goddess is everywhere here. She seems to show her face in so many ways, coming at me from all angles. On the door of a friend's yurt stands Green Tara, the national Goddess of Tibet, representing the active aspect of compassion. In the land, fruits of the Goddess flowering at every turn. The Jack fruit has seeds as big as my thumb and a mandala in the center so perfect it must be from the Goddess. The inspiration that flows here is what I'm coming to find as the Goddess within me awakening. I have started to build a Hawaiian take on the story of Indra's Net. I have built a make-shift pit-kiln to fire the clay I found on Katie's property. Along with a bunch of beautiful wood and coral from around the coast I will do my best to recreate Indra's Net...

FAR AWAY IN THE HEAVENLY ABODE OF THE GREAT GOD INDRA, THERE IS A WONDERFUL NET WHICH HAS BEEN HUNG BY SOME CUNNING ARTIFICER IN SUCH A MANNER THAT IT STRETCHES OUT INDEFINITELY IN ALL DIRECTIONS. IN ACCORDANCE WITH THE EXTRAVAGANT TASTES OF DEITIES, THE ARTIFICER HAS HUNG A SINGLE GLITTERING JEWEL AT THE NET'S EVERY NODE, AND SINCE THE NET ITSELF IS INFINITE IN DIMENSION, THE JEWELS ARE INFINITE IN NUMBER. THERE HANG THE JEWELS, GLITTERING LIKE STARS OF THE FIRST MAGNITUDE, A WONDERFUL SIGHT TO BEHOLD. IF WE NOW ARBITRARILY SELECT ONE OF THESE JEWELS FOR INSPECTION AND LOOK CLOSELY AT IT, WE WILL DISCOVER THAT IN ITS POLISHED SURFACE THERE ARE REFLECTED ALL THE OTHER JEWELS IN THE NET, INFINITE IN NUMBER. NOT ONLY THAT, BUT EACH OF THE JEWELS REFLECTED IN THIS ONE JEWEL IS ALSO REFLECTING ALL THE OTHER JEWELS, SO THAT THE PROCESS OF REFLECTION IS INFINITE

THE AVATAMSAKA SUTRA
FRANCIS H. COOK: HUA-YEN BUDDHISM : THE JEWEL NET OF INDRA 1977

Hitch-Hiking back to the tiny Hawaiian hut to work on the infinite net of the Goddess, the art she creates and the world that is reflected. Talk to you all soon! Aloha!

Alter Native

Yesterday I visited a sacred temple in the Kealakekua (Ke-a-la-ke-ku-a) Bay. The temple has been guarded my the women of one family for the last 44 generations. I spoke with the guardian for a while about her ideas of Goddess. I started off by explaining that I am a student at The Evergreen State college, which I described as an "alternative" college. Right as a said this she corrected me, "You mean Alter Native". She continued to explain that all alternative approaches are just a revival of native approaches. She has been a native advocate for the last 20 years with the UN. She has traveled to almost every country on earth to learn and teach with the native peoples of our world. My time with her was short and we made plans to meet for a formal interview next week.
" The Goddess of the West is not gone, she is only sleeping within each of us. It is our own power that will awaken her."